I can pretty much throw myself in the pile with shitty corporate America. Since they rush every single friggn Holiday! Which means that I completely skipped over bitching about thanksgiving, and jumped straight to bitching about Christmas. At least I waited until after December 1st. Unlike you people with your damn trees.
Here we are. Feels like I was just telling you about my ventures Christmas shopping intoxicated off of Pinot Grigio… Time flys when you’re looking at memes all day and trying to be an Instagram model…crazy.
(Me and my girls being festive )
This will be my second holiday season single. The firsts are always the hardest to get through they say. Yet, here I am! After 365 days though, I feel like a Hoefessional. Just kidding MOM & DAD! But seriously this won’t be so bad. Especially since alcohol is a huge distraction for me. Who cares if it brings on depression, weight gain, and could lead to addiction. Sounds right up my alley. Plus, a few Christmas jingles promote single-ism. Not a typo, my own diagnosis for people like myself.
Single-ism : philosophy of one who has no problem interacting with the opposite sex, hanging out, even casually dating. Wants no serious commitment, due to past heart breaks, unless you’re putting him or her up in Kensington Palace.
Back to the Christmas jingles, isn’t there one about Christmas cheer? Drinking plenty of that. Check. How about the Baby it’s cold outside song? “So, really I’d better scurry (Beautiful please don’t hurry) Well maybe just a half a drink more .” My kinda convincing! Check. Oh, can’t forget the song about mixing and mingling! Mixing my Jameson with club and mingling with emotionally unavailable men. Check Check !
Not only has Chris Kringle convinced us it’s ok to be single, he’s also co-signs dating more then one person is totally in the spirit. The more the merrier!
After this blog is published though, I might be single, single and have to kiss myself under the misletoe. But hey self love, right, and I’ll save tons of money on my Christmas gift shopping!
Have a wonderful Holiday season.
P.S if anyone needs a fill in girlfriend for family parties to avoid being harassed about being single HMU !
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